Are you a snowball kind of girl?
What I mean by that is when you do something wrong, does the guilt from a poor decision eat you up from the inside-out, leading you to believe or think... What's the use in trying to change, I already messed up?
Hence the snowball effect. You see, that's when it really starts rolling. That's because when we make one bad choice and believe it really doesn't matter if we try to do better or change because we already messed up, it can often lead us to another and then another bad choice, hence growing bigger and bigger - just like a snowball rolling down a hill.
As that mass of slushy ice grows bigger and messier, oftentimes, so do the continual patterns of bad choices. The truth is, they will both lead you nothing but down. That is because repeatedly bad choices are wrapped in guilt, shame, and lies.
So, what are we called to do when we fail and mess up?
Turn away from the snowball and turn to the snow "maker."
Just because we mess up or fall into a repetitive sinful choice doesn't mean we are too far gone that we can't make the choice to stop and change. We can ALWAYS seek forgiveness with a pure heart and start anew.
1 John 1:9 says "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."
And...
1 Chronicles 16:11 says "Seek the Lord and his strength; seek his presence continually!"
These verses should put God's love for you in perspective. You can never mess up and fall too far away from God that He isn't ready and waiting on you to seek His forgiveness and grace.
While your choices matter, they really matter to the One that created you because He ultimately knows what you are capable of, and what good you have to offer to this world. He knows and sees your beauty, even in the mess. You are worth more than the sum of that snowball of bad choices. So instead of rolling with it, let the snow melt and give your heart to the maker. The One that, in time, can make all things new.